Tough Talks: An Action-Project Method Analysis of Parent-Child Conversations about Military Life

Military service can have significant impacts on the entire family system, including frequent relocations, parental deployments, and constant adjustments in family dynamics and support networks. Civilian spouses often bear the burden of managing childcare, family matters, and household responsibilities during deployments. Military-connected children face unique circumstances that can impact their development and social-emotional wellbeing. The functioning and wellbeing of military spouses and their children are largely interconnected, and communication between spouses and their children can play a vital role in shaping children’s ability to cope with and understand military life. Nonetheless, there is relatively little previous research on this topic. In this study, I utilized the action-project method (A-PM) to explore the following question “How do military spouses communicate with their middle school-aged children about the realities of military life?” I conducted video-assisted qualitative interviews with five military spouses and their children from across Canada. A consensus-based qualitative analysis grounded within Contextual Action Theory revealed several projects, actions, and supplementary themes throughout within- and cross-case analyses. Common projects across the parent-child dyads included: (a) fostering closeness and connection within the family; (b) creating shared understandings of military life; and (c) imagining and planning for the future related to relocation and deployment. Additionally, the cross-case analysis revealed nine common patterns of actions that families engaged in as they navigated conversations about military life. Finally, five salient supplementary themes emerged from the cross-case analysis. These findings provide insight into how families navigate unique stressors, make sense of their shared experiences, and bring forth innovative coping strategies. Considerations for those engaging in counselling work alongside military families are discussed