Son-preference but daughter-birth: A phenomenological exploration of the experience of mothers in Tamilnadu, India

This phenomenological study explored the experience of mothers having daughters but preferring sons, their experience as non-preferred daughters and the influence of the latter on the former as affirmed by the participant mothers in Tamilnadu, India. Participants of the study were 10 mothers with the age range of 28 - 35 years (M=32.5, SD=2.20). Data collected using in-depth interviews were content analyzed for themes. Findings indicate that the socio-cultural context of India has significant influence on both experiences. The ten themes that emerged from the experience of having daughters but preferring sons are: pressure from self and others to give birth to sons abuse of mother and baby girl ridicule from the family and society due to gender biased attitudes being held responsible for giving birth to all daughters due to ignorance about fetal sex determination lack of a son to fulfill traditional son-specific roles in the family liabilities as well as advantages of having daughters strong personal commitment in rearing the daughters positive (joy in the first experience of motherhood) and negative (like anxiety, low self-esteem and conflicts in family and society) consequences of the experience and coping strategies like adaptive parenting style and religious coping. The five themes of the experience as non-preferred daughters are: perception as unwanted at birth discrimination as daughters against sons in different areas being considered burdensome as daughters negative consequences of the experience such as low self-esteem and interpersonal problems and coping strategies like crying and downward and upward comparisons. The study has implications for mental health workers, policymakers of the state and NGOs who work with this population as well as for researchers. Based on the findings of the study and the participants suggestions, a program was proposed to enhance the well-being of mothers who were non-preferred daughters and currently have daughters but prefer sons