This article examines the idea of ‘middle-class monarchy’ emerging in Europe from the internationally publicised marriages of Kate Middleton to Prince William in the United Kingdom and Charlene Wittstock to Prince Albert in Monaco. Through a careful analysis of sexuality, class and race in three major British newspapers, we demonstrate how media discourses surrounding the marriages deploy European monarchies as sites of neoliberal governmentality. Deployed as transmitters of instrumental happiness and conceptualised as an individual choice and project achievable through the control of the body and realisation of one’s desires, Kate embodies the white postfeminist vision of a highly educated, post-liberation woman able to combine the roles o...