Parents’ experiences of abuse by their adult children with drug problems

Aims: To examine parents’ experiences of abuse directed at them by their adult children with drug problems. Material and Method: The material consists of 32 qualitative interviews on child-to-parent abuse with 24 mothers and eight fathers. The interviewees had experienced verbal abuse (insults), emotional abuse (threats), financial abuse (damage to property and possessions) and physical abuse (physical violence). Findings: In the parents’ narratives, the parent-child interaction is dominated by the child’s destructive drug use, which the parents are trying to stop. This gives rise to conflicts and ambivalence. The parents’ accounts seem to function as explaining and justifying their children’s disruptive behavior in view of the drug use. The fact that an external factor - drugs - is blamed seems to make it easier to repair the parent-child bonds. The parents differentiate between the child who is sober and the child who is under the influence of drugs, that is, between the genuine child and the fake, unreal child. The sober child is a person that the parent likes and makes an effort for. The child who is on drugs is erratic, at times aggressive and self-destructive. Conclusions: The interviewed parents’ well-being is perceived as directly related to how their children’s lives turn out. The single most important factor in improving the parents’ situation is to find a way for their adult child to live their lives without drug problems