Bereavement and personal change

The numerous systematic studies of bereavement behaviour made in recent decades probably stem from Freud's “Mourning and Melancholia" (1917} and have been much influenced by his concept of the "work of mourning". The aim of this paper is to consider the meaning of this term, the processes which it connotes and its appropriateness in the light of the large body of knowledge now available about bereavement behaviour. 'Grief' is taken to mean the ordinary painful emotion experienced at the death of a loved person who has been significant in the life of the bereaved. Freud wrote of "the normal emotion of grief"; Autton (1967) wrote, "Grief is an emotion and a very painful one" and quoted the classic account of the grief experience of King David: And the king was much moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept; and as he went thus he said, 0 my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! would God that I had died for thee, 0 Absalom, my son, my son!(II Sam 18:33) It is the pain of loss, the sorrow of separation, the hurt of permanent severance from someone who is felt to be a "part" of oneself. Its most common expression is tears of sadness and regret which flow unbidden and unsought as the pang of grief is felt. The pain of grief is as the joy of love; we pay for love, the (Parkes 1972 p.5) just as much a part of life it is perhaps, the price cost of commitment