The Michelangelo phenomenon

gelo model suggests that close partners sculpt one another’s selves, shaping one another’s skills and traits and pro-moting versus inhibiting one another’s goal pursuits. As a result of the manner in which partners perceive and behave toward one another, each person enjoys greater or lesser success at attaining his or her ideal-self goals. Affirmation of one another’s ideal-self goals yields diverse benefits, both personal and relational. The Michelangelo model and supportive empirical evidence are reviewed, the phenomenon is distinguished from related interpersonal processes, and directions for future work are outlined. KEYWORDS—Michelangelo phenomenon; interdependence; ideal self; relationships People have dreams and aspirations, or mental representations of the skills, traits, and resources that they ideally would like to acquire. These aspirations include diverse goals: People may want to acquire desirable traits such as warmth, confidence, or decisiveness; to achieve professional success in the form of advancement, peer respect, or financial benefits; or to advance important pursuits involving religion, travel, or athletics. Most explanations of how people acquire new skills, traits, and re-sources are intrapersonal, examining the individual in isolation (cf. Carver & Scheier, 1998). But granting that people sometimes achieve desirable goals through their own actions, this person-centric approach ignores the important role that close partners play in helping people achieve their dreams and aspirations. In the following pages we review theory and research regarding the ‘‘Michelangelo phenomenon,’ ’ one of the most prominent in-terpersonal models of how close partners promote versus inhibit each person’s pursuit of ideal self goals (Drigotas, Rusbult