1 Working with Couples Who’s Sex Life Isn’t Working: Current Cultural Factors Diminishing Couples ’ Sexual Satisfaction

“You were intended not only to work, but to rest, laugh, play, and have proper leisure and enjoyment. To develop an all-around personality you must have interest outside of your regular vocation that will serve to balance your business responsibilities. ” Grenville Klieser-19th century author In today’s fast-paced, high-demand culture, many couples find themselves caught in a state of time and energy scarcity that affects not only intimacy within their partnerships, but also their ability to understand the constraints and conflicting cultural imperatives that impact them. This paper will review three themes associated with sexual and relational discontent which, in part, are exacerbated by modern urban work/life demands. In this study, three hundred sexual autobiographies of graduate students studying Marriage and Family Therapy from 1997-2007, plus 100 couple therapy interviews conducted in 2006, were analyzed for recurring themes correlated with relationship and sexual dissatisfaction. Participants resided in Seattle, Washington, US where the high-tech industry and high cost of living set the pace for corporate and family life. The first study group consisted of 300 graduate family therapy students ’ age range 21 – 60 years of age with the median age of 30. The gender breakdown was 23.4 % male and 76.6% female, 17.6 % ethnic minority and 7.8 % international. The couples study group consisted of 14 couples and 100 interviews. The age range of this group was 25 – 58 years of age with a 14