Managing Closeness in Psychotherapy

Closeness is an elusive concept that is nevertheless central to the thinking of many psychotherapists about the process and goals of their work. Closeness is actually a metaphor that names something otherwise lacking a name. The author proposes that the behavioral correlate of an experience of closeness is an act of sharing. Managing closeness in psychotherapy therefore amounts to a series of decisions about what will be shared. An important characteristic of sharing is that it tends to be progressive, a source of its therapeutic power and its dangerousness. The implications of these ideas are examined, with particular attention to the problem of sexual abuse and those isolated individuals (both patients and therapists) who are more in need of therapeutic closeness and more vulnerable to its overextensions. I had a talk with Matthew [age 4] about your presentation on closeness in the treatment relationship. He said, “What is closeness ” I said, “Closeness between people? ” He said, “Like standing near each other?"” Note from a colleague: Young Matthew quickly achieved clarity about the concept of closeness that I had to arrive at by n more circuitous route. Closeness seems to be an important word these days. It is often used in the informa