Commentary GRIEF ON THEWEB

Western societies increasingly have been dismantling the boundaries that separate life and death (Howarth, 2000). Studies of grief have repeatedly found that life and death are not separate, and that normal grief need not and does not terminate continuing bonds with the deceased (see Klass, Silverman, & Nickman, 1996). The end of the life of a significant other is not the end of the relationship; rather the relationship persists, not frozen in time, but evolving with modifications of biographies of self and of the deceased. These articles suggest that the bonds between the living and the dead continue into the indefinite future, and that the dead as well as the living play an active part in that bond. The four articles in this special issue focus on a new means that bereaved people have found to represent their continuing bonds with the deceased: not only by going to the physical cemetery; not only by keeping photographs and mementos at hand; not only by having continuing thoughts of and conversations with the deceased or seeking his or her guidance in life; not only by carrying out the legacy of the deceased, but by placing a memorial on a Web site on the World-Wide-Web. A central theme in these articles is the wish and reality of holding on to the deceased, as well as letting go—of maintaining the tie while accepting that the person is dead. These memorials repeatedly acknowledge the continuity of attachment over time, rather than its ending. Maintaining a tie with a deceased loved one can be self-affirming and comforting, and the maintenance of the bond can be more freeing than its denial. The status of parent, child, grandchild, spouse continues as a part of ones ’ self, and to deny it may threaten the sense 7